Some of you may not know that I've been working a part-time job. It's exhausting, I hate it, and the pay is lousy. It's also been moving closer to full-time all the time.
So I've decided to quit.
I will no longer play almost full-time referee for the adorable cherubs pictured below.
I'm moving right into slave management.
From this day forward, anyone in this household caught bickering, hitting, spitting, biting, hair-pulling, or otherwise deliberately annoying their siblings will be shanghaied into slave labor.
Why didn't I think of this before?
I will have an immaculate house in less than three hours and be able to retire from my part-time job.